Doctor to sardar patient : Ab aapki tabiyat kaisi hai.

Sardar : Doctor saheb Pehle se jyada kharab ho gayi hai.

Doctor : dawai khali thi kya?

Sardar : Nai doctor saheb. dawai ki shishi to bhari hui thi.

Doctor : Are Sardar ji mere kehne ka matlab hai ki, dawai le li thi kya.

Sardar : Ji, aapne dawai de di thi aur maine le lit hi.

Doctor: Abe, dawai pili thi kya?

Sardar : Oho, nai doctor saheb dawai to lal thi.

Doctor : Abe GADHE, Dawai ko piliya tha kya?

Sardar : Nai. Doctor, Piliya to mujhe tha.

Doctor( in frustration) : Abe teri to, Dawai ko muh lagakar Pet me dala tha k nai?

Sardar : Nai doctor saheb.

Doctor : Kyon?

Sardar : Kyonki dhakkan band tha.

Doctor : Teri sale, to Khola kyon nai.

Sardar : Saheb, aapne hi to kaha tha ki, shishi ka dhakkan band rakhna.

Doctor : Tera ilaz main nai kar sakta.!

The Corporate language!!

"We will do it" means " You will do it"

"You have done a great job" means "More work to be given to you"

"We are working on it" means "We have not yet started working on the same"

"Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means "Its not getting done.... At least not tomorrow!".

"After discussion we will decide - I am very open to views" means "I have already decided, I will tell you what to do"

"There was a slight miscommunication" means "We had actually lied"

"Lets call a meeting and discuss" means "I have no time now, will talk later"

"We can always do it" means "We actually cannot do the same on time"

"We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline" means "The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time."

"We had slight differences of opinion" means "We had actually fought"

"Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you" means "Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"

"You should have told me earlier" means "Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!"

"We need to find out the real reason" means "Well I will tell you where your fault is"

"Well... family is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected" means "Well you know..."

"We are a team" means "I am not the only one to be blamed"

"That's actually a good question" means "I do not know anything about it"

"All the Best" means "You are in trouble"

1. Tu Mera bhai hai.

2. Gaadi mai Chalunga.

3. Abe abhi itni Aur Andar ja sakti hai.

4. Tu bura mat manna bhai.

5. Mai teri Dil Se Izzat Karta hu.

6. Aaj Chad nahi rahi hai kya bat hai.

7. Tu Kya samajh raha hai mujhe chadd gayi hai.

8. Ye mat samajh ki pi ke bol raha hu.

9. Yar kam to nahi padegi

10. Chhote Ek Ek Chhota aur ho Jae.

11. After 6 th Peg..:Baaap ko mat Sikhao.

12. Yar magar Dil dukha diya yaar.

13. Kuchh bhi hai, Bhai hai Apna.

14. Tu Bolna Bhai kya chahiye.Jaan chahiye hazir hai!

15. Mere ko malum hai tere ko pyar ho gaya hai.

16. Yeh mere peena ka last day hai

17. Abe BHABHI ke baare main mat bolna koi bhi !

18. After Last peg : YAAR JINDAGI JHAND HOO GAYI YAHAN PE AAKE !

19. Main akele chala jaunga

20. Tune mere se 2 peg kam pee thi!!

21. Ye neat wala, _______(girlfriend) k naam ka...!!

22. worst case : ...oye sab chup karo,

GHAR se fone hai...Hello !! haan dad ..bilkul theek hoon..

89 + 2







12 + 53







75 + 26

25 + 52

63 + 32





I know! Calculations are hard work, but it's nearly over..


Come on, one more!







123 + 5









QUICK! THINK ABOUT A COLOR AND A TOOL!



Scroll further to the bottom....




A bit more...







You just thought about a red hammer ! , didn't you?

If this is not your answer, you are among 2% of people who have a different, if not abnormal, mind.

98% of the folks would answer a red hammer while doing this exercise.

If you do not believe this, pass it around and you'll see.

Be sure to put in the subject line if you are among the 98% or the 2% and send to everyone, including the person that sent it to you.

Murgiya dar gayi ....sab ne do do ande diye magar ek ne sirf ek anda diya

Malik: "tum ne 1 anda hi kyon diya ".
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"Sir ye aapke dar ki wajah se diya hai waise main to Murga hoon"

A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband. Suddenly her husband burst into the kitchen.

"Careful ... CAREFUL!! Put in some more butter!! Oh my Gosh!! You're cooking too many at once. TOO MANY!!

Turn them!! TURN THEM NOW!! We need more butter. Oh my Gosh!! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER?!

They're going to STICK!! Careful ... CAREFUL!! Be CAREFUL!! You NEVER listen to me when
you're cooking! Never!! Turn them! HURRY UP!!

Are you CRAZY? Have you lost your mind? Don't forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them. Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!!"

The wife stared at him. "What the hell is wrong with you? You think I don't know how to fry a couple of eggs?"

The husband calmly replied, "I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I'm driving".

There were two nuns...

One of them was known as Sister Mathematical (SM), and the other one was known as Sister Logical (SL). It is getting dark and they are still far away from the convent.

SM: Have you noticed that a man has been following us for the past thirty-eight and a half minutes? I wonder what he wants.

SL: It's logical. He wants to rape us.

SM: Oh, no! At this rate he will reach us in 15 minutes at the most! What can we do?

SL: The only logical thing to do of course is to walk faster.

SM: It's not working.

SL: Of course it's not working. The man did the only logical thing. He started to walk faster, too.

SM: So, what shall we do? At this rate he will reach us in one minute.

SL: The only logical thing we can do is split. You go that way and I'll go this way. He cannot follow us both. So the man decided to follow Sister Logical. Sister Mathematical arrives at the convent and is worried about what has happened to Sister Logical. Then Sister Logical arrives.

SM: Sister Logical! Thank God you are here! Tell me what happened!

SL: The only logical thing happened. The man couldn't follow us both, so he followed me

SM: Yes, yes! But what happened then?

SL: The only logical thing happened. I started to run as fast as I could and he started to run as fast as he could.

SM: And?

SL: The only logical thing happened. He reached me.

SM: Oh, dear! What did you do?

SL: The only logical thing to do. I lifted my dress up.

SM: Oh, Sister! What did the man do?

SL: The only logical thing to do. He pulled down his pants.

SM: Oh, no! What happened then?

SL: Isn't it logical, Sister? A nun with her dress up can run faster than man with his pants down.

She said, "Seventy-five cents". The boy stared counting the coins he had in his hand. Then he asked how much a small cup of ice-cream was.

The waitress impatiently replied, "Sixty-five cents".

The boy said, I will have the small ice-cream cup. "He had his ice-cream, paid the bill and left.

When the waitress came to pick up the empty plate, she was touched. Underneath were ten one cent coins as tip. The little boy had consideration for the waitress before he ordered his ice-cream.

He showed sensitivity and caring. He thought of others before himself.

Lawyers should never ask grandmas a question if they aren't prepared for the answer.

In a trial, a small-town prosecuting attorney called his first witness, an elderly grandmother to the stand.

He approached her and asked; "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"

She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you, Mr. Williams. I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you're a big disappointment to me. You lie, cheat on your wife, manipulate people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."

The lawyer was stunned! Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know the defense attorney?"

She again replied, "Why, yes, I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was a youngster. He's lazy, bigoted, and has a drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and his law practice is one of the worst in the state. Not to mention he cheated on his wife with three different women. One of them was your wife. Yes I know him."

The defense attorney almost died.

The judge asked both lawyers to approach the bench and in a quiet voice said: "If either of you rascals asks her if she knows me, I'll send you to the electric chair."